October 18, 2008

Saturday Smile

From "Dear Webby's Humor Letter":

*Laws of Life*

* Murphy's First Law for Wives: If you ask your husband to pick up fiveitems at the store and then you add one more as an afterthought, he willforget two of the first five.

* Kauffman's Paradox of the Corporation: The less important you are tothe corporation, the more your tardiness or absence is noticed.
* The Salary Axiom: The pay raise is just large enough to increase yourtaxes and just small enough to have no effect on your take-home pay.
* Miller's Law of Insurance: Insurance covers everything except whathappens.
* First Law of Living: As soon as you start doing what you always wantedto be doing, you'll want to be doing something else.
* Weiner's Law of Libraries: There are no answers, onlycross-references.
* Isaac's Strange Rule of Staleness: Any food that starts out hard willsoften when stale. Any food that starts out soft will harden whenstale.
* Lampner's Law of Employment: When leaving work late, you will gounnoticed. When you leave work early, you will meet the boss in theparking lot.
* The Grocery Bag Law: The candy bar you planned to eat on the way home from the market is hidden at the bottom of the grocery bag.